If only I hadn’t made that investment, If only I hadn’t said that terrible thing, If only I had said that, if only I could just have one more day with, If only I had bought that, If only I had given, If only I hadn’t given, If only, if only, if only. How many times in life do those simple two words proceed from our heart? We miss a mark, or experience some minor or major setback, we have shortcoming or we experience down right failure, you can be sure that shortly afterward those two little words will show themselves, and we need to take an action before those seeds of that make matters worse.
If only, is the precursor to the regret we are experiencing in the situation we are having take place in our life at that moment. It may seem like there is no win for we regret the things or actions we did, or, we regret the things or action we didn’t take. Is there any winning with regret? But what exactly is regret? It is defined as: a feeling of sadness or disappointment, a wish, sorrow coupled with a desire or strong feeling, it is sorrow, grief, anguish, woe.
How often a simple and seemly unimportant action turns into a moment of life long regret, why, because regret will attach itself to the soul of a person and ever come forth at a time when you are experiencing the same or similar action of the past. With regret sown, we take a different action in an attempt to prevent a repeat of that which caused the first regret, should the outcome be similar to the first, then we compound the regret and drag ourselves deeper into the hole that seems to have no way out.
Regret comes from what we do or not do, so it is seeded by choice, it is your decision therefore your victory or your cause of regret. It can be a lesson learned or a weigh of care that we do not need, again it is your choice. Philippians 3:13-14 13 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, 14 I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. (KJV) Regret will hold us back, we learn as Paul did to forget what is past, Paul as Saul did horrible harm to the early church, yet He came to the place where he could say “I have wrong no man.” He learned that regret would not help him achieve the plan of God for his and regardless what he saw or some sniping voice said he had no regret. I am saying he was not sorry for his actions, no, he experienced sorrow, but he took it, turn it, and made good from it. 2 Corinthians 7:10 – For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death. (KJV) He says his sorrow was godly and that lead him to salvation, the Greek word “sozo” look at its meaning: save or saved, whole, healed, preserve, well, prosperous. We may have sorrow over our situation, but it will lead to an action that will turn for the very good.
Regret comes with whisperers, you know those who like to remind you of your failure, or, what you did wrong. Generally the loudest voice of those bring the accusation comes from within, you are condemning yourself, but who cannot believe you. Remember, you are a feeling being, your feeling will tell you lies, plain and simple. How you feel may not be factual and you cannot, must not, believe them. Believe only that which you know to be truth, rarely is that found in feelings of regret. So what is the truth, scripture, that is the truth you must seek what scripture says, then that must be what you speak over your situation. Ecclesiastes 7:10 – Say not thou, What is [the cause] that the former days were better than these? for thou dost not enquire wisely concerning this. (KJV) Solomon the King, is why are looking back, why are longing for what used to be, this is regret. He says this is not a wise plan, “forget about it” look forward. Isaiah gave us the same advice, Isaiah 43:18-19 Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old.19 Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert. (KJV) Later the Apostle Paul said the same for our wisdom, in Philippians quoted above. Do not allow regret to hold you back.
Stop saying what you are not, but begin to say what scripture says you are, look at this list (lengthy) this is what you are, what you are should be free from regret.
Matthew 5:13 I am the salt of the earth.
Matthew 5:14 I am the light of the world.
John 1:12 I am a child of God.
John 15:,5 I am part of the vine, and Christ’s life flows through me.
John 15:15 I am Christ’s friend.
John 15:16 I am chosen by Christ to bear fruit.
Acts 1:8 I am Christ’s personal witness sent out to tell everybody about Him.
Rom 6:18 I am a slave of righteousness..
Rom 6:22 I am a slave to God, making me holy and giving me eternal life.
Rom 8:14,15 I am a child of God; I can call Him my Father. Gal 3:26; 4:6
Rom 8:17 I am a coheir with Christ, inheriting his glory.
1 Cor 3:16;6:19 I am a temple-a dwelling place-for God, His Spirit and His life live in me.
1 Cor 6:17 I am joined forever to the Lord and am one spirit with Him.
1 Cor 12:27 I am a part of Christ’s Body.
2 Cor 5:17 I am a new person. My past is forgiven and everything is new.
2 Cor 5:18,19 I am at peace with God, and He has given me the work of helping others find peace with Him.
Gala 3:26,28 I am a child of God and one with others in His family.
Gala 4:6,7 I am a child of God and will receive the inheritance He has promised.
Eph 1:1, I am a saint, a holy person. C\f Phil 1:1, Col 1:2
Eph 2:6, I am a citizen of heaven, seated in heaven right now. Phil 3:20
Eph 2:10 I am God’s building project, His handiwork, created in Christ to do His work.
Eph 2:19 I am a citizen of heaven with all of God’s family.
Eph 3:1, 4:1 I am a prisoner of Christ so I can help others.
Eph 4:24 I am righteous and holy.
Col 3:3 I am hidden with Christ in God.
Col 3:4 I am an expression of the life of Christ because He is my life.
Col 3:12, I am chosen of God, holy and dearly loved. C\f 1 Thes 1:4
1 Thes 5:5 I am a child of light and not of darkness.
Heb 3:1 I am chosen to share in God’s heavenly calling.
Heb 3:14 I am part of Christ; I share in His life.
1 Pete 2:5 I am one of God’s living stones, being built up in Christ as a spiritual house.
1 Pete 2:9,10 I am a member of a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a special treasure a people belonging to God.
1 Pete 2:11 I am only a visitor to this world in which I temporarily live.
1 Pete 5:8 I am an enemy of the devil.
1 John 3:1,2 I am a child of God, and I will be like Christ when He returns.
1 John 5:18 I am born again in Christ, and the evil one cannot touch me.
Revelation 12:11 I am a overcomer, by the blood of Jesus, this is my testimony.
If you have regret, why not look at it in a different fashion, look at an acronym for the word.
R: is for resourceful, a positive change can be found
E: is for eternal, chose the positive way for you will have eternity to live with the decision.
G: is for go, take action, do not just sit back and do nothing
E: is for encouraging, encourage yourself with positive things, especially what scripture says
R: is for repent, repentance is simply to turn around and chose a different path, stop doing the same thing over and over.
T: is for tough, be unwavering, stand on scripture, Ephesians 6:13-13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. 14 Stand therefore, (KJV)
When we fall into regrets clutches we should take on an attitude of gratefulness. I know that sounds rather strange, however, look at Romans 8:27-30 And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. 29 For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren. 30 Moreover whom he did predestinate, them he also called: and whom he called, them he also justified: and whom he justified, them he also glorified. King James Version (KJV) We may or may not know what is the will of God in our situation, regret will most likely keep us from find that vital key out, so, God gave us a great helper, He gave us the Holy Spirit, who will help us walk through the situation and brings into that prefect will of God. That is why the verse says “all works together for good” for good, not evil, not to hurt you but for the good. Verse 29 clearly shows He knew what was happening, He also knew the answer was to be found in Christ (The Anointed One), He knew that His anointing could be poured out on your situation and the result would be shaped into exactly what Christ would have it be, something good, something praiseworthy. That is why He says “all things” work together for good. The situation may be bad, it may be dire, but when put in the hands of the anointed one it will work for good. God does not create the problem but He will surely create at good result when we give to Him and get out of His way so He can resolve it.
Paul gave some great advice to the church in dealing with the last days (which many believe we are living in now) but this advice surely applies to overcoming regret as well. 1 Thessalonians 5:15-19 See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men. 16 Rejoice evermore. 17 Pray without ceasing. 18 In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. 19 Quench not the Spirit. King James Version (KJV)
Regret looks for payback, remember our two little words “if only” they speak to us of planning, going back and changing something, payback. Yet Paul says follow a plan that will result in good, both to you and whomever may be the target of your regret. Payback will only make matters worse and cause a cycle of revenge and additional regrets.
Rejoice evermore, for the answer found in Jesus via the anointing of the Holy Spirit, so pray without ceasing, or, don’t cut off fellowship with God in the midst of your situation, or ever for that matter.
Give thanks, how often we hear, if it’s Gods will, well here we know what God’s will is, be thankful. Not for the situation, but rather that He is working it out for us. Of course, King David told us the same thing Psalms 23:1-6 – (A Psalm of David.) The LORD [is] my shepherd; I shall not want. (KJV)